The most inedible fruit, the Dingleberry: Pushing the limits of taste in the worst way.



I’m Your Dingleberry Baby – w4m

so what if i have a few dingleberries.  it comes with the turf.  can’t help i have a hairy butthole that stuff gets caught in.  can you help me get it out?

i’m hoping i don’t have to use scissors, as i really like my anus hairy.  trim it and the stubble hurts.

totally normal girl in a predicament.

reply with pic


Posted in Los Angeles

Alive for 5 hours 51 minutes, posted on a Saturday evening.

Responses: 18

Face pictures: 5

Penis Pictures: 2

Penis picture with tape measure that was only 7 inches despite the exaggeration in the email saying it was 7 ½ inches: 1

As the fourth ad on the first day, it was time to see exactly how far it could be pushed.  It was the first of many attempts to find boundaries with our new male friends.  Nothing says love like embracing the pooh balls that hang from the hair of a strangers asshole.   This ended up being the meter for the rest of the year…every other posting was compared to this one on various levels, from obscurity to disgustingness.

I’m pretty sure that I got a lot of responses due to the unique nature of the ads.  They sounded the most real because they weren’t written by some guy in his office in Chatsworth sending out spam for a living.  Sometimes things would get flagged even though there were m4w, m4m, m4t (transsexual for those unfamiliar), and mw4w ads that were far more disgusting or graphic.  My accompanying photos were always on par with anything else I had seen or tamer.  So the flagging thing was something to be expected.  Sometimes they would get reposted, sometimes I’d throw in towel.  Sometimes, they never came down…

I think you should give a pic first hairy anus girl.

that is the funniest thing I have ever read on craigslist.  Good for you and your shitty ass.  No shame in your game.  kudos.

i have a hairy ass too. i am ok with it, if you want me to bang you ass. I could do it. I don’t mind the hair.

if you can wash your ass…please….i  can talk about what it is you had in mind…not cutting dingleberrys out of your ass hair…..but fucking till the early ours then again in the morning


i ‘ll help you, just dont get too close with the scissors. Is your pussy hair too? so what do i get for helping? can i check your pussy for dingleberrys too? send me a pic too


Use a dipilitory cream, women should have smooth asses, GROSS!

Have  you tried waxing  ???

I can help you out with that. I’m a pro with the matter, as a matter of fact, that kind of matter is quite simple to fix. EW.


The following is the first correspondence I had with one of my new friends.  I couldn’t help myself.  The chance for witty banter was too great, so I did it. It started with an email from Brad.

**Der DB, I suggest that you try a hot bath and more effective wiping. The hot bath will, frankly, dissolve anything that concerns you. If you need a bath tub, just ask to try my 5′ x 5′ jacuzzi tub, it is a great soak, jets and all.  Brad

Dear Brad,  Thank you so much for your sound advice. I appreciate the insight.  How may i wipe more effectively? I use paper towels (they’re stronger) and  I always go front to back. It’s really that i have such a huge amount of hair back there (think mullet, business in the front, party in the rear) that the poo gets caught no matter what i do.  after a long day…well you can imagine.  anyway, thanks again.

Dear Kate,  I discourage paper towels. It only takes once having the plumbing back up all over the floor to realize that they can be too strong. You show very good form by keeping with the front to back motion, we both know why!  Have you tried something called “pre-moistened toweletts”? They are also available as “baby wipes” with a very soothing fragrance. You may find that  you sleep like a, well, very soundly after use.  Believe me, I completely understand why you are going to all the trouble  with your hair. As they say, beauty has it’s price.  I still say that baths are essential.  Brad

Dear Brad,  I have tried “pre-moistened toweletts” and unfortunately, the chemicals on them irritated my bung-hole. I even tried the Trader Joe’s brand, but to no avail. I must admit, a huge part of the problem is that sometimes i think i’m going to fart, and instead, poo comes out. i think Philip Seymour Hoffman referred to it as “sharting”. When this happens, I can’t always make it to the little girls room, and consequentially, the hardened dingleberries form. See, it’s really no fault of my own, my body betrays me. Do you know what that feels like? Kate

Dear Kate,  I can see that you are very sensitive, down there. I mean, back there. Maybe everywhere. It’s probably important to use the “baby wipes” type. Those are specially formulated, I’m told. Trader Joes may carry them, but Babies ‘R Us certainly does. On the subject of your leaky sphincter, I really don’t know what to say. I admit that I’ve experienced what you describe, but only once. My poor dear, what must it be like day in and day out….? In my case I was on the 134 and it was pretty messy.  Perhaps a change of diet could be of help? I’ve heard good things about  “garlic capsules” and there’s no side effect. Have you considered that  reducing flatulence on the whole may be of some use? Do you like beans?  On a wholistic note, I urge you to let go of the notion that your body betrays you. Perhaps your body has an important message that it would like you to pay attentition to, and you aren’t hearing it yet? Make friends with your bung-hole and your bowell. Talk to it, ask it to help. Let me know how everything come out.
Sincerely, Brad

Dear Brad, Thank you again for your sensitivity to my sensitivities. I will look into making adjustments into my lifestyle and even my way of thinking.  Have you ever just pulled them out? I mean soaking them out is the logical way, but i’m expanding on the baby wipe idea, that maybe some baby oil would grease them upso they would slide right off. That way i could maybe preserve them for submission into the Guiness Book of World Records.  This way, I could turn this negative body issue into a positive one.  much appreciation, kate

Dear Kate, Thanks for asking. I’d love to “just pull them out”. What a great way of bonding and creating intimacy, I am truly flattered that you would ask me to be in such an important role in your life. I accept.  Yes, baby oil would be handy. I do see how generally rubbing much of your body with it could help, could relax and at the same time, invigorate you in  very pleasureable ways. I’m skilled in massage. I want you to let me know what feels good, and how you want to be touched during this. I take direction well, and added to my nautral somatic intuition and sensuality, well, you’ll see.  What is your pleasure? Expectantly, Brad


I never asked him to  “pull them out” I asked him if he EVER had.  And rubbing his hands that just touched pooh and oil all over somebody’s body is not sexy.  No, dingleberry’s are not sexy.  Much less a pleasuring post-removal session.  Gross gross gross.

I egged it on, and instant karma is a bitch.  Be careful what you ask for, you may just get it, as I just had.  Witty banter, my ass.  But, I had a taste of interacting with the unknown.  I was hoping it wouldn’t bite me on the ass, but there’s 368 days left…