Archive for September, 2011

If You Don’t Like Blurry Penis, Then Don’t Click Here.

Friday, September 30th, 2011

Since I’m well aware that people search for blurred penis, I decided to gift the internet, nay, the world, with another pixelated dick.   He has nice balls and a solid manscape.

And it’s also very considerate that he sits on a napkin.  His Mom appreciates it, she loves that couch.


About the Asshole (that’s me)

Wednesday, September 14th, 2011

I’m the author/asshole.  I’ve left my name off for a couple reasons.

1. I have impressionable nephews who do not need to know that their aunt accidentally once peed on her boyfriend.  Even though it was an accident, they don’t need that image in their head.

2.  It’s because I’m one of you.  If you’re reading this, you are probably a lot like me and have similar disgusting experiences to refer to, so you don’t need my name.

3.  Because I’ve always secretly wanted to be nicknamed “squirts” or “the crippler” or “barfy mcgee” so let’s stick with that.

So for the time being, I’ll tell you this.  I’m a girl.  I’m 30-something.  I’m from Chicago and LA.  I lack a filter most of the time.

I’ve written and produced random things for a very long time.

I have a lot of friends and lovers.

I really hope you read this on the toilet.

And I fully know how gross I am.  My future potential employers don’t need to know that quite yet.

So for now, just call me Kate.

PS, I’m a really good cutter and paster.  I can hit command X and command V like nobody’s business.